daffodils

"We have short time to stay, as you, We have as short a spring…”

“We have short time to stay, as you, We have as short a spring…”                                  ~ "To Daffodils" Robert Herrick (Hesperides, 1648) 

“Look at the stars, look how they shine for you, and everything you do, yeah, they were all yellow.” ~ Coldplay, "Yellow" (2000)

I started this post last Sunday, on Easter, and meant to finish it during the week. That didn’t happen because work wound up being incredibly busy and stressful. Most nights I came home late, ate a bowl of ice cream for dinner, and didn’t even bother turning on my laptop. I knew this would likely be the case — we’ve had a big project underway since before Christmas and there’s a major deadline tomorrow at noon.

Many moons ago, early in my career, this was how I worked because I thought it was how one was supposed to work. (Plus, I’m an Aries.) Suffice it to say my thinking has evolved significantly since then. Now, these types of weeks are anomalies, not the norm, because there are more important things in life.

As if to illustrate exactly that, The Husband and I were eating dinner on Friday when we received the horrible and shocking news that a longtime friend’s son had been killed in a car crash. He turned 23 last month. To know this family—when I say that they are the most generous and kind people you’d ever imagine, I’m not exaggerating. They do things like randomly go to Starbucks and pay for everyone’s orders for an hour, just to spread some light and joy in a world that often is quite dark. They intentionally plan and budget for these things. Our family has been the recipient of their abundant spirit many times over the years.

And for this to happen to them, of all people, feels incredibly unfair. I mean, we all know life is fucking unfair and that bad things happen to good people and all those stupid platitudes. At the same time, though, our society makes us believe that the goodness, the love, the karma you put out into the universe will come back to you.

This weekend, as we are so utterly heartbroken, it’s hard not to feel that such sentiments are a crock of shit.

My therapist would probably say this is a moment when my emotional and rational minds are clashing, because on reflection, I know the alternative isn’t better. To not live our lives being kind and generous and loving in the ways we can? That defeats the purpose for our existence, right? I think so.

But what I know this Sunday is that the collective grief among those in the world—my immediate circle and those beyond—feels too much. We’re all struggling and carrying so, so much.

Be kind.

Be kind.

Be kind.