From Here to There and Back
Where I've been lately and what I read in May
Many years ago, my friend K. wrote a fantastic blog titled From Here to There and Back, a name I secretly wished I’d thought of first. The phrase describes perfectly the mindset of living in one place, perhaps as a transplant (like our family, here in Pittsburgh coming up on 13 years) then visiting for however long in another place you may have originally—and perhaps, more importantly, emotionally—call home or where you feel most rooted (Philadelphia, for us) then returning and doing it all over again at a certain point. It captures the betwixt and between, the coming and going, the push and pull of wanting and sometimes needing to be in two places simultaneously, maybe for different reasons, the reality and symbolism of the journey.
So perhaps K. won’t mind me borrowing the title for today because from here to there and back feels apt as a descriptor for what has been a much busier than usual spring, one filled with more from here to there and back than I’ve had in quite some time. There’s been something nearly every weekend. My little Chevy Trax has, I’m convinced, worn a path in the Pennsylvania Turnpike, and turned 100,000 miles this week. And as tends to happen with being so on the go, I’ve been absent from this space (please lie to me and tell me you’ve noticed) and I’ve missed it, along with reading your Substacks, for those who have them. Let’s ease back into this thing with a catch-up post, shall we?
Oh, The Places They’ll Go
It started in late April, with College Girl’s graduation. That was a local event, thankfully, because I was incredibly sick the week prior (most likely allergies, but who knows anymore). Fortunately, I completely recovered, and it was a great day. The following weekend I drove several hours east to pick up some of College Boy’s stuff and we continued on to Philly for an overnight visit at my mom’s.
Two weekends later it was back to The Boy’s college for graduation. He went into graduation week having interviewed for a position in his field on Monday, references were requested on Tuesday, and he accepted an offer on Wednesday. Graduation was Saturday, then the next day came the news that training for said job would be in Philly — back on the Turnpike we go! — over Memorial Day Weekend.
I should interject something here about the driving. For a variety of reasons, getting their drivers’ licenses hasn’t been a priority for either of my kids. And you know, we’ve been generally okay with that, also for a variety of reasons. Whereas my Gen X crowd couldn’t wait to get our licenses back in the day, this lack of interest in driving is commonplace for Gen Z. And I honestly haven’t minded all the from here to there and back with college drop offs and pick-ups because we’ve had some really great conversations. However, that’s starting to shift on their part because, as incredibly inequitable and unfair that it is, there are simply more opportunities available for those with access to a car—and The Girl is finding that a lot of positions in her field require a driver’s license. She’s been working on that and now has her learner’s permit with driving lessons happening this week — and The Test next Monday!
Playing Tourist in My Hometown
Memorial Day Weekend was spent in Philly with fantastic weather. While The Boy was in training for his new job (which I can’t really talk much about in a public forum such as this), The Girl and I went to the incredible Philadelphia Museum of Art (the Mary Cassatt exhibit is delightful and inspiring), did some shopping in Chestnut Hill and Mt. Airy, toured the Edgar Allan Poe House, stopped by the Reading Terminal Market, and had dinner with one of my college besties, T., and his husband. It had been years since I’d been to these spots (and I’d never visited the Poe House) and we had the best time.
When we visit Philly, those trips are usually confined to the suburbs where our mothers and our friends live so this gave The Girl a chance to see a whole new dimension of the city. There’s an area by the Museum along the Schuylkill River called the Fairmount Water Works which my father once worked on as a mechanical engineer and having a chance to see it again and show it to the granddaughter he’d never met (at least not in this realm) was special.
On the way back to Pittsburgh we took a quick detour off the Turnpike to visit my longtime friend B., her husband, and their son who was in the hospital after a very complicated surgery. I hadn’t seen them since we moved from Delaware nearly 13 years ago and despite the lousy circumstances, I was glad I could give my mama bear friend a few hugs.
Road Trip to Maryland
Last weekend The Boy and I headed to the DC suburbs. He was invited to a graduation party in Potomac for one of his friends, and since most were coming from a distance, the family invited them to stay overnight. I stayed in scenic Rockville (cue up R.E.M.) and got together with another college friend on Saturday night and her adorable kids, followed by high school friends for brunch on Sunday. The only photo without people from this trip was the cinnamon roll below, as found at Ted’s Bulletin in Gaithersburg’s Downtown Crown (highly recommended brunch spot, by the way) and listed on the menu as “Cinnamon Roll As Big As Yer Head.”
What I Read in May
With all this travel, there wasn’t much downtime and my May reading reflected that. I only managed to read three books last month (and they were all rather short).
Western Lane by Chetna Maroo (Picador, 2023, 160 pages)
In a previous post (linked below) I wrote about the Women’s Prize for Fiction, for which Western Lane was longlisted. (It was also shortlisted for the Booker Prize for Fiction.)
Eleven-year-old Gopi has been playing squash for many years. When her mother dies, the sport becomes her life, particularly after her father signs her up for an intensive training program. As she grows apart from her sisters, she becomes drawn to Ged, a 13-year-old boy who is also a talented squash player. This coming-of-age story felt unoriginal, uninspired, and lackluster. Where there could have been more substance surrounding grief or any other themes, there was considerable discussion about squash, the plays, the practices, etc., and this didn’t interest me. It’s a debut novel and I agree with other reviewers who commented that it was fine but didn’t reach Women’s Prize caliber. 2 stars out of 5.
Intervals by Marianne Brooker (Fitzcarraldo Editions, 2024, 194 pages) was among those on the inaugural Women’s Prize for Nonfiction longlist. Brooker writes beautifully about her mother’s diagnosis of primary progressive multiple sclerosis, a rare form of the disease. (“We love one another into being, long and close; love builds us up and wears us thin.”) A vibrant artist, creative activist, and tarot reader in her forties, Brooker’s mother struggled as multiple sclerosis eroded her quality of life and, after suffering for a decade, voluntarily chose to end her pain by ceasing to eat or drink. It’s a heartbreaking narrative and one that shamelessly calls out how being poor (as her mother was) leads to injustices and inequities in one’s ability to access health care, social services, and more.
While their financial circumstances are different, the writing and themes in Intervals reminded me of In Love, Amy Bloom’s memoir about her husband’s decision to die on his own terms through Dignitas (also mentioned in this book) after being diagnosed with early Alzheimer’s. Intervals is a tough but important read about a difficult topic and the life-and-death chasms between the financially privileged and those who aren’t. Alas, this exquisite memoir didn’t get a shortlist nod from the Women’s Prize judges, which is rather disappointing. It gets 5 out of 5 stars from me.
The Hummingbirds’ Gift: Wonder, Beauty, and Renewal on Wings by Sy Montgomery (Atria Books, 2021, 96 pages)
During my travels I needed a very short audiobook and at around two hours long, this was it. Sy Montgomery’s friend rescues hummingbirds and she asked Sy to assist. It’s an incredibly complex and intricate process—they’re delicate and fragile creatures and need to be fed every 20 minutes, around the clock. This was an enjoyable enough listen. 3.5 stars out of 5.
All right, there you have it — my first post in almost two months. Apologies again for the absence. Hopefully it won’t be as long next time (although the boy’s work schedule does have me running a bit ragged going from here to there and back).
Sounds like a lot of travel and fun. Glad you got to experience all of it. And you came to my town, Gaithersburg. I hope you enjoyed your time here. Ted's Bulletin is lovely. I took my mom there for Mother's day.
I can tell you from experience, not having a driver's license can be very limiting, but it also can make you get more creative and take in moments on public transit (if available) to live in the moment.
What an amazing whirlwind ! I know you enjoyed it. Thanks for sharing❤️